Saturday, December 31, 2011

Ready set dont go part two

Where do you begin to prepare for a child to move away? Is it even possible? As i tried to prepare myself the past two weeks since my daughters final decission i relize one can never prepare for what youve never been through before. Ive always been fortunate in that all my kids and parents live within a couple miles from me. Any major events, and we seem to have plenty, were right here. The thought of 10 hours apart scares the heck out of me and i cant even imagine what changes are about to come. I feel such a loss and emptiness already as we say our goodbyes this evening after a big family dinner. No more weekend sleep overs, last minute dinners or someone to hang out with. No more rushing to her side or rescuing me. Camping, family picnics and gatherings won't be the same.

More than my loss however, is the loss a child will feel. As I struggle to deal with my own emotions I remain strong for her. How will she handle all of this when she relizes what has all happened? I pray for the best and ask for guidance as we all start the new year with a whole new chapter in this journey in our lives.

Here's to new beginnings, strength to pull us all through changes we will endure and the love and patience as we find new ways to stay close.

Good luck in your new adventures. May god keep you safe. Know we love you dearly.

this is where I want to but I wont get in her way, of her and her dreams, and spreading her wings....

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Choking prevention

My grown kids are always teasing me about being overly protective and concerned of choking. I never think we can be alert enough to all the hidden dangers or hear it enough. In an effort to prove my position i ran across this great article i wanted to share.

What can I do to keep my child from choking?
Choking is a very common cause of unintentional injury or death in children under age one, and the danger remains significant until the age of five. Objects such as safety pins, small parts from toys, and coins cause choking, but food is responsible for most incidents. You must be particularly watchful when children around the age of one are sampling new foods. Here are some additional suggestions for preventing choking.

Don’t give young children hard, smooth foods (i.e., peanuts, raw vegetables) that must be chewed with a grinding motion. Children don’t master that kind of chewing until age four, so they may attempt to swallow the food whole. Do not give peanuts to children until age seven or older.
Don’t give your child round, firm foods (like hot dogs and carrot sticks) unless they are chopped completely. Cut or break food into bite-size pieces (no larger than ½ inch [1.27 cm]) and encourage your child to chew thoroughly.
Supervise mealtime for your infant or young child. Don’t let her eat while playing or running. Teach her to chew and swallow her food before talking or laughing.
Chewing gum is inappropriate for young children.
Because young children put everything into their mouths, small non-food objects are also responsible for many choking incidents. Look for age guidelines in selecting toys, but use your own judgment concerning your child. Also be aware that certain objects have been associated with choking, including uninflated or broken balloons; baby powder; items from the trash (e.g., eggshells, pop-tops from beverage cans); safety pins; coins; marbles; small balls; pen or marker caps; small, button- type batteries; hard, gooey, or sticky candy or vitamins; grapes; and popcorn. If you’re unsure whether an object or food item could be harmful, you can purchase a standard small-parts cylinder at juvenile products stores or test toys using a toilet paper roll, which has a diameter of approximately 1¾ inches.

Last Updated 10/20/2010
Source Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5 (Copyright © 2009 American Academy of Pediatrics)

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

When caregiving ends

Family caregivers experience a range of emotions and stages in their lives when providing care for a loved one. Several different resources cite levels of caregiving, and while some stages differ depending on the source, one fact remains constant – eventually, the caregiving will end.

If you are caring for an elderly relative, the end of your caregiving days may be marked by the death of your loved one. As a caregiver, you have experienced the ups and downs of caregiving – taking time from your own family responsibilities to provide care, perhaps suffering a financial burden and balancing multiple budgets, and realizing your loved one is not who he or she used to be. You have incorporated caring within the possibly already hectic routine of caring for your own family, work, and other responsibilities. It has been hard and stressful. However, your love for the one you cared for made caregiving worth your while.

It is not uncommon for the post-caregiver to feel an utter sense of loss when caregiving ends. You will experience heartache as you mourn the loss of your loved one, but you also find yourself at a crossroad in your life as to what to do now. No more phone calls for assistance. No more visits filled with playing games, dining together or simply reminiscing about good times. When once you felt worry over your loved one, that burden is gone - leaving behind a void in your life. Your grief is compounded as it overlaps the sense of who you are…and who you are going to become once the caregiving phase has ended. Your entire daily routine is filled with broad gaps that once were filled by the physical and emotional acts of caregiving.

You may find it interesting to know some research shows that many caregivers are better situated to deal with the end of their caregiving days than they realize. The family caregiver has lived this role, possibly for quite some time. Caring for an elderly loved one, especially a mother or father, illustrates the essence of life coming full circle. People in these roles have faced and grieved the loss of their loved one long before physical loss occurs. Once caregiving ends, there is a mourning process but there is also a sense of frightening wonder as to where to go from that point.

However, research shows that once caregivers overcome the immediate sense of loss, they find they are organized, financially savvy and highly efficient. Post-caregivers are also able to identify and balance their own wellbeing better than non-caregivers. These qualities may put them heads above the rest in terms of gainful employment after caregiving responsibilities end. Adjusting to new life may be a change, but their experience as caregivers presents a set of tools that help determine their next steps in life.

This is good news and important for family caregivers to know. While it may be sad for a loved one to pass away, post-caregivers can look back and know they accomplished something meaningful, worthwhile, and made a difference in the life of someone else. They realize how they enriched their own lives through the caregiving process and find comfort in the experience. Once this knowledge takes root, these post-caregivers can set forth confidently, and continue making a positive impact…wherever they may choose to go.


Marla Berg-Weger, Ph.D., LCSW, Doris McGartland Rubio, Ph.D. & Susan Tebb, Ph.D., LSW and Lisa A. Parnell, MSW (2011).
When caregiving is over: the well being of caregivers of parents of dementia.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Girl scout trip to humane society

Today we learned that roughly 4500 dogs and cats pass through our local animal shelter each year. I was totally amazed to learn they also take in small animals like fish, birds, rabbits, and ferrets to name a few.

It's always heart breaking to leave with so many loving pets needing a loving and stable home. A few of them broke my heart but I especially was saddened to see elder pets abandoned or left behind for one reason or another.

The girls thoroughly enjoyed the tour and even were able to bath and groom a couple dogs. I say a special prayer tonight for the many donors and volunteers who care so much for these loving pets. May these animals find peace and happiness all the rest of their lives in warm and loving homes.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

The big hunt

For those who follow my blog I often talk about raising the kids to enjoy the outdoors and our appreciation for hunting and fishing. This year had heightened excitement as we were all together for the first time in 5 years.

My youngest son shot his first deer opening morning! How exciting for all of us to be there and share in the excitement. My husband shot a 8 pointer. Boy was he happy the boys drug it up a steep embankment for him. As for the rest of us... We seen plenty of doe but not a lot of luck this year with few opportunities to see buck. I did however, witness 2 buck fighting in the wild which was quite exciting. No, i didn't have the opportunity to shoot as i was in a bad position. We let our youngest shoot her beebie gun for the first time. Spent time with family catching up. Did some swimming and lots and lots of walking. The kids even took out some time and goofed around with my youngest brother to do some 4 wheelin.

What a blast! Truly a great year!!!

Friday, November 18, 2011

The dirty little secret

I hope be revealing this secret it doesn't bring a rash of phone calls, text messages and emails from long lost relatives. Theres nothing more frustrating then 50 lost relatives rushing in to act like your best friend when they think your gonna die and then disappearing once again. Honestly?
With that in mind, please respect our right to some peace and quiet.

Why is the possibility of cancer a dirty little secret for some men? Honestly! Isn't this a time to lean on family? Not all would agree. Some people, maybe through denial or anger try to bear it alone. My husband included.

I'm sure he will be angry but I'm about to disclose his dirty little secret. The truth is for the past week my husband and I have tried to stay strong and be there for everyone else when what absolutely no one knew was he was being evaluated for testicular cancer.

Thankfully, after further evaluation, it's looking like were safe for now although he does still have to meet with a specialist.

So why do some keep cancer a secret? Why are some embarrassed about cancers like testicular or breast cancer? Please, please remember to get checked and don't ever feel ashamed or embarrassed.

As it turns out he's at greater risk of skin cancer. He will have a removal in a couple weeks.

Just another curve-ball in our lives!

Tuesday, November 1, 2011


It seems like yesterday my oldest two kids were moving out of the house. I actually was extremely depressed. It was worse then any empty nest syndrome Id ever heard of. These kids were my life! If I had it my way wed all live like the Walton's for pete-sakes happily ever after. Lucky for me shortly after they moved out they both came home. Call it an adjustment period I got lucky to prepare. My poor kids must have thought I lost my mind as I just wanted to hang out all the time. What I really needed was them to be little again.

By the time the younger 2 moved out I was more prepared for the changes I would again endure. The fact were still raising our 6 year old helps alot. That poor child will never get rid of me. In fact, my grand kids are doomed.

None the less, as my 17 year old daughter was nearing her 18th birthday Miley Cyrus came out with the song "Ready Set, Don't Go". I think I cried my eyes out many times as I listened to that song and certainly its been fitting many times with my children looking back. After all, the best compliment a mother can receive from her child is the ability to fly solo. I had done my best in raising them to be responsible well rounded children. Even though I needed them and I didn't want things to change I knew in my heart they were ready. Not that by any means I had a choice; but I had to let them go.

Moving fast forward, amongst all my fears and tears I'm faced with yet another challenge. This time its not just about me. This time my older daughter came to me and informed me she's highly considering moving out of state! EEEEK!!! I know what your all thinking but I have a bigger challenge than how will this affect me. As the words came out of my daughters mouth I completely understood where she was coming from. After all, she gave us the greatest gift of all. She gave my husband and I a child. Wasn't she suppose to move on with her life too? I understood. It wouldn't be fair of me to hold her back. Her fiance is working there and the two of them have been living apart the past few months. I found myself once again listening to my trusty "Ready set, don't go". The problem is do I support my daughter or beg her to stay? Like the song says, shes waiting on my blessings for she hits that open road....

I'm worried that in her leaving it will deeply affect my youngest daughter. (Her birth child). What affects could this pose for her? How will she feel? Some things are once again going to need to be addressed and my thoughts are that this time we will need to seek the advice of a professional. We haven't said anything at this point as its not set in stone. My heart is already aching to even think of the pain this could cause. One thing is for sure.... things will never be the same and I'm not ready.

this is where I want to but I wont get in her way, of her and her dreams, and spreading her wings....

U of M offers new certification program for adoption professionals | Minnesota Public Radio News

November is National Adoption Awareness Month.

U of M offers new certification program for adoption professionals

by Sasha Aslanian, Minnesota Public Radio
November 1, 2011

St. Paul, Minn. — The University of Minnesota's Center for Advanced Studies in Child Welfare and the Department of Human Services Tuesday announced a new certification program to train social workers and mental health experts who work with adoptive families.
Minnesota families adopted 588 children from the state's foster care system last year, and 397 children were adopted internationally.
Department of Human Services Commissioner Lucinda Jesson said the new permanent families were reason for celebration, but the joy and hard work of adoption only starts with that adoption ceremony.
"We have 339 children under state guardianship awaiting adoption now. Many of these are adolescents; they're sibling groups who must be adopted together," said Jesson. "They have a lot of unique needs and that's where this training for the professionals who work with them will help so much."
The state contributed $120,000 in start-up costs for the certification program, which will train 24 people in the Twin Cities and 18 in Duluth this year. The state has designated $57,000 in scholarship funding for the first two years of the program. There are plans to expand to Stearns and Olmstead counties in the future.
Fintan Moore is in the first class to receive the Permanency and Adoption Competency Certificate (PACC). An adoptee himself and the father of an adopted son, Moore said there are too few professionals with the deep knowledge required to assist adoptive families.
"I've sat at tables at park buildings and Lutheran Social Services listening to other adoptive parents who have literally cried in front of me for support, for insight, for respite as they have tried harder and harder to raise children who live every minute of every day with the harsh and lifelong impact of early trauma, early neglect, early maltreatment and abandonment," Moore said.
Adoptive parents will be able to search a database to find professionals who have completed the PACC training.
Joe Kroll with the North American Council on Adoptable Children commended the state and the University for their vision in creating the program.
"[Minnesota] is probably one of the more adoption-friendly states in the country and it's because of the history of the people of Minnesota who have always reached out to folks in need," said Kroll. "A caring people and now we'll get some professionals who can help us through some of the tough times."

Monday, October 31, 2011

Halloween happenings

We started out the week with our youngest having strep which 3 days later landed us at the hospital progressing into Pnemonia. With a week of missed school and mom in the hospital for cellulitis we had a lot of time to prepare some goulish treats.

With the help of my oldest daughter, we frosted cutout cookies, made cupcakes and went trick or treating not once but twice. We even made some witches brew which was quite a hit.

Hope you all had a safe and happy Halloween and made some special memories of your own.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Country Picnics: A Guide To Pizza On The Farm « CBS Minnesota

Whether your looking to try something new or get out and enjoy the outdoors here is a wonderful adventure to try.

Country Picnics: A Guide To Pizza On The Farm « CBS Minnesota

Friday, October 28, 2011 - Halloween Safety Tips

Found a web sight with some great safety tips I wanted to share. May everyone have a safe and Happy Halloween.

One day at a time my daughter overcomes her addiction

Being a non- drinker i tried to be an advocate to my children. I believe they can only attest to one time ever having seen me drink. I would have never thought I would one day had children who would have had issues with abuse. Yet for one reason or another it happens. no one is immune.

Having said that it breaks a mothers heart to see their child dependent on something that clearly is destroying their life. As a parent you never want to see your child hurting. You do anything to protect them and keep them safe. To see their life spiraling out of control and theirs nothing you can do is the greatest pain a parent can have. You start to question where you went wrong? What you should have done differently? And how in the world can you help and make it all stop?

I can say this.... Their is nothing I found that works until they are ready to quit! You are not in control. They are not in control. I can say, and trust me this one is hard, you cannot be the enabler. This was the hardest for me to learn. I was not helping the situation by pretending it was going to get better.
Several times I thought my daughter hit her rock bottom and just when mom came to the rescue we were off and running again.

Then one day I received a call out of no where. My daughter was asking questions about treatment. I was pleased and actually relieved. However, just like in the past I was disappointed when shed find more excuses to continue on and pretend it wasn't that bad. In her eyes she didn't have a problem.

It wasn't until her boyfriend came to us and as a family we learned to stand up to this illness together that she finally relized their was a problem.

That day finally came when she put herself in treatment. After just a week she was learning of all the hurt she had kept inside and the effects it had not on just herself but others around her. She underwent treatment for 4 months. As each day, week and month passed we regained our daughter.

She started to enjoy life again. As she continues her sobriety we couldn't be more proud of her and the woman she has become. I have my daughter back. Here she is at a suprise party the family threw for her after graduating treatment.

Working together teaches love of the outdoors

Over the years many people have asked how my husband and I can get along with my ex so well. It wasn't always easy. There was a time I hated him. He's an ex for a reason.

Although I never knew it way back when the two of them were friends growing up. They grew up in the same neighborhood. It took several years but eventually we all learned to get along.

When the kids were little the ex would bring them fishing and hunting. After my husband and I were married and also started camping and fishing, later on it was gun safety and then hunting.

We formed a party and what we ended up with was well rounded, kids who became responsible adults. They love to camp, hunt, fish and enjoy the outdoors.

I relize this isn't possible for all people but for my kids I can say they were fortunate. They were fortunate to have a step dad who loved them as his own and a dad who welcomed him as well.

As we get ready for deer hunting I thought I'd share some pictures of the latest season.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Carving the pumpkin

There's something about the innocence and excitement of a young child and carving their Halloween pumpkin. For a first timer our youngest grand baby dug right in. As for my youngest she's all pro and well seasoned at gutting a pumpkin. She even remembered to separate the seeds for roasting later.

I absolutely love the carving tools they sell now days too. I can tell you we sure didn't have anything like them. They do wear out and break quick and although these two little punkins are too young to use them yet I sure love them.

Dads Trade Overtime for Quality Time

Have you heard about the watch D.O.G.S. Program?

Dads are heroes of the school hallways who are not only engaging men. Their presence is inspiring children, reducing bullying but also enhancing the educational environment.

WATCH D.O.G.S. (Dads of Great Students) - is the father involvement initiative of the National Center for Fathering that organizes fathers and father figures in order to provide positive male role models for the students and to enhance school security. Today, more than 2127 active programs in 40 states and New Zealand participate in the WATCH D.O.G.S. Program!

Please visit and follow the link for how you can help your child and their school today.

Dads Trade Overtime for Quality Time

Shared from

The annual trap shoot tournament

It's no secret our family loves the outdoors. We, raised our children to hunt, fish and camp since they were just days old. Almost everything has revolved around the great outdoors.

This weekend was no different with the annual trap shoot tournament. My husband and oldest son try to compete every year. Theyve had their name on the trophy many times. My oldest son took first place again this year. The weather was beautiful, the company was fantastic and overall it was a great way to end summer and start hunting.

Congrats Dustin!

Saturday, October 22, 2011

My new keurig

I can't say enough about my keurig. I first used one several years back that was offered by a rep to my employer. Now that I own my own I absolutely can't live without it. I don't care for coffee. That's my husbands thing. I'm a hot chocolate and chai kinda girl. However, I find myself buying all kinds of things just to try. It's easy to use, looks fantastic, and offers an enormous selection to my guests. I've already sold numerous friends and family on it. Does anyone know how I could get a sample assortment?

Im a troop leader

Being a troop leader for daisy scouts has been an eye opener. It's exciting and yet I feel I missed out so much by not being there for my other daughters to do the same. I feel I missed out on a lot.
This week the whole troop was out sick and we weren't informed until after the meeting. Disappointing? Yes! But we made the best of it and had a great time together. Here we are making a collage of our nations bird and even had time to paper machet a bird bath.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

What not to do when involved in a car accident

Started out my day by being rear ended on the highway. I was sitting at the stop light in my husbands car, which I really typically don't drive. I was looking for the rear defrost when I felt the fast, sudden jolt. Safely, crossing the intersection before pulling off to the side, a young male roles down his window apologizing and claiming no damage. Preaching this warning to my kids since the time they started driving, I know I need to get out and assess the damage myself as well as exchange insurance information. Having said that, sometimes as a parent we don't always follow our own advice which later comes back to haunt us.

As I get out of the vehicle I feel absolutely fine. There appears to be no damage to either car. I immediately suspect the driver has no insurance as he is begging me not to call police and offering to pay if I see anything. I don't and I sympothize with the driver simply jotting down his license plate and make of car as he drives off. I'm actually comfortable knowing everything is fine and I've saved this kid for the day. A good deed for me today. He looks familiar and I'm pretty sure he used to hang around my youngest son.

Driving down the road I pull over to make a quick call to my husband whose only concern is if I'm ok. I next call my younger son to gossip about this mornings events. After not being able to answer his first question which was "who was it"? I relize I've failed to follow my own advice and my son is quick to point that out.

Continuing on to my girl scout meeting I again look over the car after reaching my destination. I now notice a black rubber scuff mark but still no concern. While sitting in training I start to become uncomfortable and find myself moving quite a bit. A headache has began to consume me. Still oblivious to the fact this is all due to the onset of the accident it isn't for yet another half an hour when I reach home that the pieces come together. Here I am. My neck hurts and is radiating into my shoulder. I have a headache and now my knee is also painful. I'm sure I'll be fine in a couple days but with no health insurance of my own I realize my good deed might have been my first mistake to protect myself.

I guess next time I might want to take my own advice when faced with the " to act or not to act" questions in life. Chalk this up as a learning experience.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

So you think Gastric Bypass Surgery is the easy way out?

We all know its not as attractive being overweight and most of us would love to be thin and look great in no matter what we wear. Do you know however, what the dangers are of being overweight? Obesity is a health risk. Excessive fat increases your chance of heart disease, having a stroke, diabetes, cancer, gout, gallbladder disease, gallstones, arthritis, and breathing problems including sleep apnea.

Next lets talk about the secondary health risks. Things like depression and anxiety. Do you realize how many overweight people deny themselves of living life to the fullest? I've known many people, like myself, who absolutely hate going anywhere in public. Simple things like swimming, amusement parks, school functions, out to eat, family gatherings, meeting new people, even job searches and promotions can cause anxiety in an overweight person. Even having your picture taken makes you run and hide or at least attempt to get in behind someone else.

My daughter, age 23, just had Gastric Bypass Surgery today. Was I concerned? Absolutely! I would be a fool not to be. In fact, I tried on numerous occasions to talk her out of it. To be honest, I've seriously thought about doing it myself. If it wasn't for having to give up my two biggest contributors, caffeine and cigarettes I probably would have. The problem is we all want a easy fix. We all wish it were truly as easy as everyone thinks. In all reality, Gastric Bypass has it's own health risks. It also doesn't come as easy as everyone might think. My daughter has been working with her surgeon for a year. My guess is, behind most overweight person lies someone with health issues, psychological issues or some other problem. Whether diagnosed or not most people have a reason they are overweight. Mine started as having thyroid disease. It escalated when I became even less active when I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. For my daughter, she was a very thin girl most of her life. She got pregnant at 16 years old and did initially lose weight after having baby. However, that was short lived when depression and anxiety became a major role in her life. She's battled the roller coaster of weight ever since going from one crash diet to another. Pressured by peers and trying to fit in she then began to drink to try and fit in. Again, combined with depression and anxiety she quickly becomes consumed with drinking. It wasn't until she started having other health issues and her life began to spin out of control that she seriously started talking about having Gastric Bypass Surgery.

Thanks to the surgery that has a very strict protocol she underwent many physical and psychological exams. Her doctor ordered counseling and she put herself in treatment. Her life is truly for the better. After years of depression and anxiety shes finally living life and feeling great about herself again. After successfully completing treatment she has a fantastic outlook on life again. Despite all the wonderful things that are going on for her she still has other health issues which prevent her from working a lot of jobs and she still battles her weight. Sometimes you have to step back, take a deep breath and ask which outweighs the benefits. For her, it was weight loss.

So, no, it is not a quick fix. Its not taking the easy way out. This is a lifelong commitment that took over a year to get here. For good or bad this is her new life. I pray for the best for her. I wish her great success and I hope she is able to live every day to the fullest. I hope she is able to smile confidently again and that everyday is a blessing and better than the day before.

Gastric Bypass Surgery goes far beyond looking good in your clothes.

A day in the life of a cancer survivor

It's Thursday morning and that means it's back to the cancer center. We've spent nearly the past year and a half here every Thursday. It's a pretty typical day with lab work starting at 9am followed by a visit with the cancer doc before heading off for chemo. As I sit in this small 8x10 room separated nearly by a curtain I watch as nurses and numerous volunteers hustle by. I recognize many familiar faces. Some have also been here awhile others I can tell are new. I've learned to differentiate by the look of the unknown on their faces as well as pain and sorrow in their eyes. I am only grateful for the wonderful care team who is always eager to please and make each person feel cared for and important.

As my eyes glance around our room my mother naps in her recliner; wrapped up cozy beneath 2 cotton warmed Blankies. Her IV cocktail is the usual combination of chemo & magnesium. her NASCAR is on. A repeat of the past weekend events which she thoroughly enjoyed being a part of.

Yes, my mother is a survivor! I am so proud of her compassion for others, her will to fight and the strength she continues to move forward.

Saturday, October 8, 2011

When Domestic Abuse Hits Home

 Being an advocate for many years of domestic abuse I was sure my daughters and sons alike would never become victim. AS a mother, a family member or a friend the last thing you ever want to imagine is that someone could hurt someone you love so much. Yet it happens. It happens everyday! It doesn't matter if your rich or poor or what ethnic background you have. Amazingly enough Ive had to sit back knowing something was not quite right for the past month. Doing this can rip apart at your ever last sense and completely empower you. Taking away and ripping at every last sense of security and dignity one has. I sat, I watched and I tried to step back and pray that I was wrong. I called a county social worker, I talked to family, I talked to family and friends. It seemed I was the only one seeing the true devastating signs. I know I'm the overbearing mother who cant let her baby go... Do you realize how hard it is to be on the outside looking in when everyone else sees you as this overbearing mother?

Then a few days ago, call it a sign but my brother posted a link on domestic abuse. Again, I get this gut wrenching feeling that this is yet another sign to keep my eyes open. I felt almost as it was a sign from God saying don't turn your back just as I'm about to let go. Maybe I am overbearing?

I start getting random phone calls and requests to babysit. I know deep down something is wrong. Today the call comes. Thank God sooner then later. My child has been punched, choked and is emotionally distressed. Worse yet my grand baby fell victim last night. I do what I know best. I drop what I'm doing, run to the rescue and call the police. Yes, they are safe. Not before a confrontation and many more abusive remarks which were directed not only at my daughter but her friends and family. How I ever managed to keep in control is beyond me to be honest. After several pictures, reports and a couple hours with police we are trying to make sense of a devastating event. As we all pick up the pieces I want to share the warning signs and link from Everyday Health my brother posted just a couple days ago. Thank you Kipp for posting this when you didn't even know there was an issue.

Domestic abuse pulls families apart every day. If you are a victim please get help. If you know of a victim please let them know you are there for them. Know the warning signs! Promises the abuse will stop are just that. They rarely do.

What is domestic violence?

Domestic violence is abuse that happens in a personal relationship. It can happen between past or current partners, spouses, or boyfriends and girlfriends.
Domestic violence affects men and women of any ethnic group, race, or religion; gay or straight; rich or poor; teen, adult, or elderly. But most of its victims are women. In fact, 1 out of 4 women will be a victim at some point.1
The abuser may use fear, bullying, and threats to gain power and control over the other person. He or she may act jealous, controlling, or possessive. These early signs of abuse may happen soon after the start of the relationship and might be hard to notice at first.
After the relationship becomes more serious, the abuse may get worse.
  • The abuser may begin making threats, calling the other person names, and slamming doors or breaking dishes. This is a form of emotional abuse that is sometimes used to make the person feel bad or weak.
  • Physical abuse that starts with a slap might lead to kicking, shoving, and choking over time.2
  • As a way to control the person, the abuser may make violent threats against the person’s children, other family members, or pets.
  • Abusers may also control or withhold money to make the person feel weak and dependent. This is called financial abuse.
  • Domestic violence also includes sexual abuse, such as forcing a person to have sex against her will.
Money troubles and problems with drugs or alcohol can make it more likely that abuse will happen.
Abuse is also common in teens who are dating. It often happens through controlling behaviors and jealousy.

<a href="">Symptoms of  Domestic Violence - What is domestic violence? What should you do if you're being abused? What should you do if you know someone who is being abused? Why do victims stay? - Children's Health</a>

Friday, October 7, 2011

Black and Blue: Symptoms of a Concussion - Motherly Law

Black and Blue: Symptoms of a Concussion - Motherly Law

As most of you know my daughter suffered a TBI after being hit by a car. I wish I had read this wonderful post by "Motherly Love" I might have recognized the warning signs. Please visit her blog she has some wonderful information.
Thank you,

Who Are You and Where Did You Come From?: Tips for Talking to Your Child About Adoption by Motherly Law

Who Are You and Where Did You Come From?: Tips for Talking to Your Child About Adoption

A big Thank You "motherly law" for allowing me to post this fantastic post!

Trip to Kansas City Casino 400

Most of my followers are aware my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 ovarian cancer a little over a year ago. That being said anyone that knows her knows she is a NASCAR fanatic and Tony Stewart is her driver! I am happy to announce that she did infect leave for Kansas city today and both her and my dad are having a good time. They haven't taken a vacation in 30 years so this is a long time coming. They made it safe and sound and I'm hoping it is everything she ever dreamed of and more. I'm also hoping the two of them will just have some much needed time away and time together without all the stress that goes along with life and this past year.
Love ya mom and dad! Now relax, put down the phone and enjoy each others company.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

South Dakota proves to be a great Vacation getaway!

I promised to share some of the high ores with my readers from summers events as I took some time off from blogging. Here is the one memory which proved to be an exciting, inexpensive and wonderful 4 day event.

I'm a firm believer that not all vacations need to be long, far from home or expensive in order to recharge and feel like you really had a great time. Some people travel the world and Have never even travelled their own state. Destination #1 is one of those places. We set out with our 6 year old Alexis and 3 year old grand daughter Emma. The destination.... 4 hours from home is Aberdeen, South Dakota! On our way we stopped in the small town of ortonville, mn where they had the neatest little museum and one of the best duck displays I've ever seen. It's a small little tourist information place coming into the town and even has a guide, an old school house, chapel and an old steamer boat. (picture below)

After eventually arriving in Aberdeen (now 7 hours later), hearing "Rio" repeatedly play on my sons DVD player in his mini van, 100 requests for food, snacks and bathroom breaks we make the vital mistake to stop at ihop. Despite the fact the kids have already been asking "are we there yet" for well over 100 miles, their obviously too excited and and well lost their patience to wait one more minute. After checking into The holiday inn express which is absolutely perfect for this age of kids, we headed to storybook land which is a mile down the road. Not only is it absolutely free but one of the most amazing theme parks I've ever encountered. It's well kept, well run, and with all the volunteers we spoke to you can immediately tell there city is very proud of it and should be! By the way it has the wizard of oz inside of it which is unreal. Ah, i almost forgot to mention the petting zoo! Theres also a zoo thats free there too and a really neat "mini train". Love this place and I've told absolutely everyone about it. We will go back!!! We stayed until closing. Back at our motel the kids suited up for their very own waterpark built just for small kids. The pool at it's deepest was 3 foot or less and had plenty of slides, toys and cute characters and frog pads to cross. (see pool pic)They also serve a wonderful hot breakfast in the morning which was plentiful and even served hot waffles that were to die for. After breakfast we went back in the waterpark before heading back to storybook land and whily park for most of the day before deciding to head to Sioux falls.

Sioux falls was another 3 hours south of where we were I will post that blog separate as there is so much waiting to be discovered there.
Total trip cost at this point roughly $20.00 in gas at nearly 4.00 per gallon. $120.00 for motel. $30.00 ihop.
Total $175.00.
I also want to let you know we could have stayed in a sleeping cabin for $30.00 per night had we had our own bedding with.
See adorable pics of storybook land. Note I took hundreds here. You'd have to see it to believe it!