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Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Overcoming Animosity

Just a little over 2 years ago our 2nd youngest daughter became pregnant after abstaining a brain injury stemming from a car accident. She was nearly 16 years old. This time my husband took the news better than I. I guess I was reluctant greatly because I  sat with her day after day with all her doctors. I seen it as nearly impossible for her. I remember being so angry. I questioned how in the heck did this happen to us again? She was the one who complained when her older sister was pregnant. Family seemed to be supportive of her and tried to help any way they could. Her doctors on the other hand, were outright mean. One doctor flat out told her there was no way she would ever have a child and that she should have an abortion. This doctor told her she would loose the child and never carry the baby full term anyway. My daughter, as you can imagine, went on a rampage. She stormed out the door and I followed. At that moment I realized how much she needed me.

My daughter never gave up. Not only did she still go to high school and all the doctors but she joined every teen support group, took every class she could on parenting and spoke out at area schools. She even received an award a year later for logging in over 500 hours of parenting classes and was asked to speak at the local county social service agencies. Her OB/GYN refers to her as a "text book" pregnancy. She ate perfect, exercised right and gained exactly 20 pounds. She had the perfect pregnancy and just one week before her due date she delivered a healthy and happy baby girl.

I am pleased to say she recently turned 18 and will be graduating high school in February.  Not just a GED but her actual high school diploma. She went back to her high school full time. Baby is now a full fledged toddler who is very loved and well cared for. She maintains her employment and pays for all her and babies needs and is looking forward to starting college this upcoming fall. Life hasn't been easy for her. She's been a single parent since becoming pregnant. (Baby's Dad left running). She chooses not to ask for child support as he is not involved and receives no help from the county. She does of course, have a lot of support from her family. They still reside at home.

I want to be clear when I say don't ever assume someone will fail. Sometimes determination goes along way. Our daughter was determined. Her daughter is her life and best friend. Had she listened to that doctor or was concerned with my own animosity in the beginning she would have lost out on Gods greatest gift. As parents, we want whats best for our children. Sometimes we think we know whats best and were wrong. Although I would have preferred both of my girls been older I feel truly blessed. We are blessed with our 5 year old whom we adopted and now our 2nd youngest grandchild. This should be a reminder to us all that the mother has choices. She chose life!

If you are a teen who becomes pregnant it is important to talk to your family. Talk immediately. You should be seen by a doctor as soon as possible. Teens worry that their parent will be angry or disown them. The truth is even I was angry for a day or two but we settle in and get used to the idea. Most parents will be very supportive even if you think they won't.

2 comments:

Naturally Creative Mama

Thank you for stopping by! I am following you back. It's nice to meet someone else who knows the stress of food allergies. Let me know if you have any great receipes... I am always looking for more!
Katy
www.kdbuggie.blogspot.com

Anonymous

Great blog...
I adore your strengh!
I'm a first time mom to a 9 moths old girl, and I'm looking forward to read blogs, and book about parenting... I'm not looking for a how-to-do stories but for a real ones, like yours. Thanks for sharing. I'm a new follower.

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